Self-care is something that has gone mainstream and others have embraced wholeheartedly. A common saying regarding on social media is “self-care isn’t selfish”. We couldn’t help but think that isn’t true. If you look up the definition of selfish it says:
Selfish: concerned primarily with one’s own interests, benefits, welfare, etc., regardless of others
This basically says being selfish is being concerned with “you” regardless of what others do or say. Doesn’t that mean we are selfish in every aspect of our life too? If we do something because it feels good to us it means we are selfish. The problem isn’t about being selfish but what society has perpetuated what selfish ought to be.
Selfishness has gotten a negative connotation. It has been associated with being greedy or cruel. What has happened is that people project their values and morals to someone else. When they don’t live up to those expectations they try and label rather than try to understand.
Everyone is selfish. If you do something because it feels good to you, you are selfish. There is nothing inherently wrong with selfishness. We all should embrace it. If we can’t take care of ourselves how can we expect to serve the world in the best way possible? If we don’t take care of ourselves through any variety of self-care practices we minimize ourselves which can lead to being taken advantage of, abuse, and sickness.
We live in a world that wants to take take take. It expects others to be selfless and give their time, effort, and energy because they “ought” rather than wanting too. If someone tells you are selfish remember that true fulfillment doesn’t come from abiding by expectations of others but rather following your truth. In the end, you are responsible for the life that you live not anyone else.
We would love to hear your thoughts on this in the comments below!
Lots of love,
Jasmine and Phrieda